Pain

I can feel much more than I let on to those I let visit my headspace.

Don't get me wrong, my headspace can be very grim sometimes even to outsiders, but whenever I have visitors I make sure I hold that stuff back.

Is it tiring? Yeah, it is. However it is much better than letting my pure, unrestricted emotions flow into someone I care about.

I already tried that once, and the person I communed with ended up crying in my arms so much they passed out.

If I ever see the other folks who I let visit my headspace in person again, I might let them feel it, but I am afraid it's going to have an adverse effect on them and I don't want to hurt them.

I'll leave it up to their discretion, I guess, but I really don't want to do that kind of thing long distance. Whoever wants to feel that stuff should never feel it alone. I would never wish that kind of emotions even to my worst enemy (ok, maybe there would be one exception to that one but they have dropped of the face of the earth, so they don't count).

I need a hug