Numb

Processing emotions can be really tough.

I recently had a long time to sort myself out and get into a better headspace after a traumatic event and then while I looked for a job.

Did I sort myself out? No. I did not.

I just did what I always do. Put my emotions in a box never to be opened again. However during that time while I was doing so, I felt numb. Numb to my friends, to my roommate, to anyone who I came across.

It wasn't long until I became a ghost walking.

Numb to everything.

The sad part is that every know and then, I would like to stop feeling things again. To feel numb. Sometimes, it's just too much to process and I break down.

But I owe it to the people I care about to never do that again, because they should never see me that detached from reality. Not after what happened last year.